Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Dealing with a child with SEN

Had high plans to keep on top of my blogging - Ha! Like life will let me. All sorts of issues going on in this house at the moment with birth children and the fosterlings. But I want to focus on one other today.

A few months ago I had the opportunity to write an article for SEN Magazine on any topic relating to Ella. I decided to write about birthdays, and have attached a photo of the article. Quite proud if I say so myself, made me smile.

However, that's the first time she has made me smile in a few days. Jeff had to go to USA and it's like she's been given a carte blanche to misbehave. Well,  there's an understatement. Being Hyde of Jekyll and Hyde fame; or the girl with the little girl; or any other character with a split personality seems to be her target

Jeff left Thursday. This week Ella has had to deal with Jeff leaving, going back to school, her favourite TA not being there, the fosterlings very stressed, and her period starting. I guess a perfect storm. So I understand why she's behaving like she is, but when you're in the middle of that perfect storm, it's soul destroying.

Friday after a quiet cuddly afternoon kicks off at bedtime, lasts about 1.5 hours. Not loud, and in our bedroom, so no-one else would even guess there's a problem. Throwing things, pinching and just being generally plain mean. On top of everything else going on it reduced me to tears;
Saturday was like walking on eggshells all day;
Sunday she wet herself when we were out, not something she does often and in the night she was awake till 5.00am Monday morning (I think a direct result of seeing the fosterling's breakdown at bedtime);
Monday we have (her, not me!) a mini meltdown, just scratches and spitting
Tuesday she throws something with such force she has broken the screen of our brand new telly. Note to self, don't bother to buy nice things.

I love this girl to the moon and back, but sometimes it is bloody hard work.So I guess I'm writing this for me because I'm hoping it will be cathartic; and for anyone out there who knows a parent/carer dealing with a child with complex needs don't always assume everything's fine because they're always smiling and laughing about it. Behind closed doors they could be dealing with a nightmare you cannot imagine and might even be sinking under the stress.

P.S. (Can you do a PS on a blog?) If you're  visiting from the SEN Magazine and would like to know more specifically about Ella, pop over to this page :)


  1. Wow Suzanne. I'm so sorry that she's been so challenging the past few days. I hope Jeff gets home soon.


Love to hear from you. Please leave your thoughts below. Suzanne xx